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Post by trapper7 on Aug 18, 2010 15:11:25 GMT -5
You know you're in a redneck church if.....
The finance committee refuses to provide funds for a chandelier because none of the members know how to play one.
People ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5,000, whether the two fish were catfish or bass, and what bait He used to catch em.
When the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering", and five guys and two women stand up.
Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday.
One member asks to be buried in his 4X4 truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of!"
In a congregation of 500 members, there are only seven last names in the church directory.
Members think "rapture" is something you get from lifting something too heavy.
The choir robes were donated by and embroidered with the logo from Billy Bob's Barbecue.
The collection plates are hubcaps from a 56 Chevy.
Instead of a bell, you are called to service by a duck call.
The minister and his wife drive matching pickups.
The communion wine is Boone's Farm "Tickled Pink".
"Thou Shalt Not Covet" applies to hunting dogs too.
The final words of the benediction are, "Y'all come back now, hear?"
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Post by Sunshine on Aug 19, 2010 5:23:28 GMT -5
sounds like a southern Baptist church to me....lol ;D
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Post by trapper7 on Aug 19, 2010 9:56:41 GMT -5
I don't think most southern Baptist churches would use Boones Farm wine. They'd go more for something like Mad Dog 20-20. ;D
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Post by HC Trapper on Aug 28, 2010 12:21:55 GMT -5
Yep! This is my kind of church! ;D
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Post by Sunshine on Aug 30, 2010 6:19:20 GMT -5
I don't think most southern Baptist churches would use Boones Farm wine. They'd go more for something like Mad Dog 20-20. ;D 7, thats the Methodists youre thinkin of.... ;D
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Post by trapper7 on Aug 30, 2010 11:04:28 GMT -5
Oh yeh, that's right.... I forgot! ;D
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